We have this tendency to compare. We compare our bodies, our life, our job, our financial position etc etc etc. We say we don’t and I really believe we don’t mean/want to, but the fact is we do.
The thing we probably compare the most is our kids and our parenting choices. We don’t compare to harm, but we compare (unintentionally), because we want the best for our kids and we often become concerned if we feel our kids aren’t where they should be. We also compare our parenting choices, out of fear of failing and before we can help it we feel like we are doing a bad job and we aren’t succeeding.
Here is the big problem, we aren’t aware of;
We compare our worst day to someone else’s best day. We compare our kid’s worst moments to other kid’s best moments. We feel like we’re failing, because we are setting ourselves up to fail.
We torture ourselves and we end up having a bad day the rest of the day, because we allowed our irrational comparisons to get the better of us. we have to stop comparing our worst with someone else best!
We see a mom/dad in the shop and they look like they have it all together. She is perfectly dressed and her kids are smiling and chatting away like the Stepford children. Meanwhile your kids are having a meltdown in the sweets isle and you are wearing your yoga pants and an old t-shirt and you can’t help bringing yourself down, because you don’t have it all together like her.
What we don’t see is the mental breakdown she had this morning when her kids were hitting each other with a fire truck, shouting at the top of their lungs. What we don’t see is the help she might have, that you just can’t afford. What we don’t realize is that those smiling kids are probably only like this 2 out of every 10 times. We immediately forget that we have also had wonderful days, where there was another mom comparing her yoga pants-wearing day with your incident-less shopping trip.
We torture ourselves and we end up having a bad day the rest of the day, because we allowed our irrational comparisons to get the better of us. We have to stop comparing our worst with someone else’s best!
Just breath and keep swimming, one of these days it will be your turn to have that moment where the kids are sitting, smiling and it will last just long enough for you to get back in the car and enjoy the massacre that is the ride home, knowing that there was a mom thinking that you have smiling little angels 24/7.