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Imposible expectations - Melissa Swart
21270
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Imposible expectations

The other day we were at a get-together with a bunch of friends. Our kids were running around, playing, laughing and just being kids, but someone made the comment that when they have kids they will teach them to sit still and be quiet when the grown ups are talking.
Seriously!?
You’re joking right?… oh darling, let momma educate you real quick.

Don’t get me wrong this comment is completely valid, for older kids and certain situations, but these were a 1 and a half year old and two 3 year olds. These kids are meant to be running around and playing and laughing out loud. Yes, some days I feel like I want to stuff a sock in their mouth and beg them to just be quiet for one blooming second, but the harsh reality is that silence is not on our side.
They are biologically incapable of sitting still for extended periods of time. Their little brains are developing, and they are not yet at the age where they can sit still and concentrate for that long. Believe me, I am gradually teaching them that sometimes they need to be just a little quieter and sit still for just a moment, but no more than they are capable.

A 2year old’s attention span is still only 6min, 6 FLIPPING MINUTES. A 3year old’s 10min, but can be longer if an adult interacts with them during the activity, key word being INTERACTS.
Why then do we put so much pressure on little kids to fit into an adult world? They desperately need to be kids, for as long as they can, because they will spend so much time in this exhausting grown-up world.

We are doing them such an injustice and when we have these unrealistic expectations, we trigger tantrums and frustration in little people that aren’t yet capable of understanding and managing these big emotions.

I refuse to apologize for my little boy and girl being kids

I refuse to apologize for my little boy and girl being kids. My kids are well mannered. They say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ and they are loving and caring and respect others. They look after their toys, because we teach them to appreciate what they have. They clean up after they have played, with a little help form mommy, because I believe that teaching them good stewardship and giving them some responsibility will shape their character. SO, them being loud and having a blast playing has NOTHING to do with their manners and I will not let other people make them feel ashamed for behaving like 2 and 3 year olds are supposed to behave.

Let them run. Let them laugh. Let them play. LET THEM BE KIDS! If I have to put off going to that fancy restaurant a little longer, for the sake of keeping my kids, kids, then that is something I am more than happy to do. I will defend their ‘kid-ness’ with my life!

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